What a time to be alive. The constant outpouring of allegations against powerful men in Hollywood and beyond results in my wanting to weep and hide in a deep hole forever. And at the same time, I cheer on those who are coming forward and naming names.
Everyone who has scoffed at the mention of rape culture needs to 1) shut the fuck up and 2) listen and take note. This is a deeply pervasive part of our culture. And sorry to those who thrive on this dark side of our society, but it’s time for it to end.
How do we do that? We speak. We share. We listen. We hold those guilty of sexual abuse accountable. We take away the power of those who would have rape culture persist. We mention the unmentionable: incest, rape, child sexual abuse, pedophilia.
Yep, it’s hard. But look to those who make it easier, those who do. The seemingly endless number of women coming forward in the Harvey Weinstein scandal, the men who named Kevin Spacey as an alleged perpetrator. Tig Notaro includes the issue of molestation in her Amazon series One Mississippi (ironically with Louis C.K. as an executive producer—are the last two episodes of Season 2 really a coincidence?). The storyline shows the deep psychological and emotional harm that results from sexual abuse, the ripple of effects of which can sting for decades after the event.
What’s a cunt to do? Come forward. Seek treatment. Find support or give it where necessary. Listen. Break the silence. It can literally mean the difference between life and death. Protect your children. Pay attention. Learn to respect women.
And for the perpetrators of sexual abuse: take responsibility for your actions. Apologize. Seek treatment. Given where we are in time, with access to a continual feed of social media, blogging, and 24-hour news cycle, you can no longer claim you didn’t know it was wrong, that you didn’t know it was hurting people, that you’re not the problem.
Because apparently we’re all the problem. We don’t want to talk about molestation because it makes us uncomfortable and feel bad. We don’t want to believe women and children because we’re indoctrinated with the ideology that they’re weaker and dumber than the fine upstanding males around us who can’t seem to stop themselves from perverting everything around them.
Whew… OK, I’m done. For now.
In This Issue
Lex Voytex returns with a vivid and frank account of falling into fear and trying to climb out.
Lisa VanDyke stirs up some whistleblower love in this issue's installment of fabü.
The Sexy Slave (a.k.a. Erin Gibson) wants you to go fuck yourself, but only if you're a particular kind of bar patron (but note that you can change your behavior).
Brand-new contributor Katixa celebrates Wengari Maathai and condemns a worthless bumper sticker.
Amanda Bolles-Hendren, also a newbie, shares personal heartache and inspiration in the wake of tragedy.
And I, your lowly editor and publisher, sit down with Foley artist Lara Dale to discuss the word cunt, rape culture, and how we can mend.
Please stop by the pleasure center for a little art, humor, and music.
Special thanks to this month’s contributors (I love you cunts!), Ronnie Reynolds, and crashlovedog.
xo
Kristin Kurens
editor and publisher